Confessions of a Blogger: Blog, Don't Slog

The other day, I attended my girlfriend's bridal shower - It was a lovely afternoon with some of my closest friends and Family, filled with great food and happiness. That said, I was just as excited to go home and relax as I was to be there. I was tired...exhausted, actually and the thought of taking off my bra (girls, you KNOW what I'm saying!) and changing into comfy clothes was consuming. But first...before any of that could happen, I remembered I was supposed to take outfit photos in my dress.  Admittedly, this Summer has been a little crazy (aren't they all?) so I've been slightly slacking on keeping up with content and was hoping for a 2-for-1 event/blogging session scenario here but sometimes, your heart just isn't in it. Begrudgingly, I handed my Mom the camera (Thanks, Mom!) and dragged my feet to her front yard where I had nothing but suburban mini vans and basketball hoops as my choices for backdrops (God forbid). Knowing I would be disappointed with the products, I took them anyway and jumped in my car to head home. Success, I thought...one thing checked off the list.  --- A few days later, I was reading the New York Times, as in the ACTUAL newspaper, soft between my fingers and noisy on the page turn, two sensations I had almost forgotten about. I came across a feature, "When Blogging Becomes a Slog." Apparently, a lot of people are upset about the blogging break these two have decided to take. While I'm not familiar with the blog itself (yet, that is -- it looks pretty worthwhile if you're a homeowner), I am familiar with their feelings. "A passion turns into a hobby, which becomes a full-time career and in some predictable amount of time, it consumes your life." I thought about those photos I took after the shower - Instead of being creatively fulfilling, they felt forced, resulting in disappointment and regret that I didn't make more time for them. I don't want to just "check things off my list" when it comes to things I'm sharing withe the public. I want to feel proud of them and inspired...that's the reason we continue to type these words and publish these images, right? 

Point being, sometimes I worry about how much time we all spend online and along with that, how much pressure we put on ourselves to meet assumed expectations. Let's say I didn't take those outfit photos and failed to get a new post up that day -- Nothing would have changed. If you read our blog, you would most likely think nothing of it and (hopefully) be back the next day for something fresh. I'd rather share content that I enjoyed writing rather than something that was just created to meet an invisible deadline. "Do I want to pour energy into the lives of complete strangers online or the people under my roof? I think you can do both but I needed a little less online and a little more in my life." -- Erin Loechner, blogger behind Design for Mankind. Whether you're a blogger or not, this feeling is a real response to living a life online -- if you're not participating, you're still consuming and that can be just as tiring, especially lately due to the current state of the world. 

It's so hard to disconnect, it really is. We tell ourselves not to text while driving because it's unsafe (and moronic, honestly), but we do it anyway. We check Snapchat mere minutes after opening it the last time. We spend time researching hashtags and curating clever moments that would be perfect to repeat themselves over and over in the Boomerang app. It's the way the world is now and most of the time, it's understandably entertaining. But sometimes, it's okay to admit that it's ALL JUST TEMPORARY. Impermanent and fleeting until something else comes along to spark imagination. --- This is not a post about how I'm quitting the blog (I'm not) or why you should delete your social media profiles (You shouldn't). It's about the changing world, its rapid pace and doing our best to keep up. Even if you TRY to stay in the race, it will be physically impossible to. Don't stress out about one blog post or missing one day's worth of news in your Facebook feed. Pet your dog, smell your flowers, read your book or make a salad and be OKAY with the fact that you didn't share it with the world. BE OKAY with the fact that everything in your life isn't the backdrop for the ultimate photo shoot. I'm still learning to take my own advice but I know one thing is for sure... instead of taking photos in front of a mini van, next time, I'll just take a much-needed nap instead. 

P.S. I shared some similar thoughts last year too. The quest for balance continues... :)

Blogger Confessions: Volume 3

Today is not about an outfit post. Or a recipe. Or a swap. It's a confession...much like this one and this one too. Truth: I have an active case of FOMO. Back in middle and high school, I remember filling up days in my planner months in advance because I loved having things to look forward to. I don’t like missing out.

When I hear are friends are getting together, I am the first one to drop what we’re doing or cancel other plans. When I find out about an event “everyone” is going to, I struggle to feel content with missing it. I rarely find myself saying no to events, whether they are social, blogger related (there are a ton!) or work related and this tends to lead to feeling overwhelmed and slightly stressed..

I start to crave kicking back on the couch with a Netflix marathon or a being given the time to 
actually finish a book... then when it actually comes time to do those things, I STILL feel like I should be utilizing my time better. Crazy, right? My husband’s 20 minute naps turn into 2 hours and I can’t force myself to sit down for 2 minutes.

I recently read about something called the "Active Recovery Method” and I loved the meaning. Active recovery means do something fun, but not planned or regimented. This is meant to help you get back into the flow of things because a lot of times a lot of times, a couch weekend can make you feel even more tired, not renewed. 

For example, the author of this feature shared how happy she felt on a random Sunday afternoon when her young daughter decided to spend the day exploring, getting their nails done, going for a long walk, testing out hula hoops. Active Recovery. Because none of it was scheduled or planned, it was much more special.

Just like walks with this little face and those few seconds we take just to smell the flowers. So it’s not to say that I can’t enjoy a laid back movie night – It’s more of me just realizing that instead of writing something on every calendar day of the week, it’s okay to leave some blank and see what happens… no schedule, no rushing, no pressure. 

So, the FOMO cure is vacation behavior meets spontaneity. What do you guys think of this method?

Blogging Confessions: Volume 2

Meet & Greet: The name of my 6th grade assignment that was meant to serve as a time capsule of sorts for years down the road. The task of cleaning under the bed improves greatly when you stumble upon hidden gems like this, something I hadn't seen in years but as I read through, made me feel like I just wrote it yesterday. Pages are filled with my life story (up until age 13), family stories, a team sport photos and epic collages like this. Poke fun at BBMak and Ashley Angel all you want, but Center Stage is a classic).

In one of the chapters, I shared my plans for the future.I'm not sure what I love more - The fact that in 6th grade I considered fashion "my forte" or that even as a 12 year old, I valued the art of making time for yourself (and watching TV, apparently). 

After I read much of this book, I was torn between feeling happy from all the nostalgia and slightly disappointed because seemingly, I'm still very much the same person I was 16 years ago.

But then I realized, it's like I already had a great idea of who I was and wanted to eventually be. I reflected on my favorite family traditions including Christmas and our trips to Disney World, still two of my favorite things in life.

I mentioned my heroes, my parents, which is a feeling that has only grown over time. At the time, they were my guardians and while they still hold that title, they have also claimed the role of best friends.

I noted my thoughts on friendship which at the time meant, "having fun, being honest with each other and treating others the way you want to be treated. You have to know who you can trust." These elementary school words of wisdom apply not only to my best friendships today but also to the world of blogging. We all know that without the support of one another, there is no progress set in motion.

Lastly, it's important to note how much I've always appreciated everything I have. I wrote,"I hope when my children and grandchildren read this, they will see how much I enjoyed writing my story and I hope they realize what a good life I have lived." 

Since then, life has only become more wonderful and these days, I'm just sharing a very similar story in a slightly different way...with a few more readers ;)