Becoming a mother was hands down the best thing I have ever done in my life. It is what I am most proud of and something that challenges me on a daily basis. That said, it truly is the hardest job I've ever had, but one I constantly try to raise the bar on as I am responsible for two other lives. The interesting part is what worked for one year, month, or week all of a sudden no longer works. These beings are ever changing and so are their needs and my (daily) responsibilities. So every so often, we as parents need to make a shift in our parenting techniques.
Having babies was hard, exhausting even, but looking back those were the easy days. They didn't climb on anything (to fall off of) or talk back for that matter. ;) Having toddlers was maddening, but again looking back, a lot of stress (I did have two young children who both had IEP's...yes, that was a very stressful time!), and chaos, but also a whole lot of laughs and amazing memories! Now I have a six and an eight year old. These ages are both fun and so hard in their own ways. My kids are trying to figure our where they belong in this world, what sports or activities make them happy, trying to make friends and fit in at a new school, this is an entire new chapter! They are no longer little kids, but miniature people who have all of the feelings and stresses that being in school all day and having their own responsibilities that comes with things like homework, chores, etc.
This year specifically, we have needed to shift the parenting once again. It's so easy to get stuck in the day to day grind that you forget to stop and just talk with your kids. Don't get me wrong, it's good to have dinner together every night and discuss our days and chat before or after our nightly book reading time, but I'm talking really being included in what's going on in their heads. Enter date days/night with our children.
For our first date of the year, my husband went out with my son and I was blessed with a mother-daughter date. I let her pick all the activities. She told me she wanted to go painting so I found the cutest little place in Geneva called Color Me Mine. You pay a flat rate to enter and then you purchase the item you want to paint. My daughter chose a "Love" statue for her desktop and I opted for a jewelry dish. Next up, we chose our colors and from there we just chatted and painted. The entire room is so charming, it was easy to forget I was there with a six year old, I was just hanging out with one of my best girls. She talked and talked and even vented about things that have been stressing her out lately and I just sat there and listened. I think I said "Really, how come?" about twenty times!
After we were done paining, we paid and were told we'd be getting a call once the pieces were fired in the kiln and ready for pickup. She proclaimed this was the best day ever, but she was hungry so next we went out to lunch. We ended up at CPK and ordered pizza and lemonade. From there we had lots more laughs and quite a bit more girl talk. No, really! She was asking about daddy and how I knew he was the one I was going to marry. It's always fun to see what going on in the beautiful head of hers! During lunch she told me she wanted to get a diary and although I'm not all about getting my kids whatever they want exactly when the want it, this was our special day together. So, shortly after lunch I found a Claires Boutique and picked up a diary with a lock and key. This day was so special to me and it was so wonderful to not only hear her say the same, but watch her write just that in her new diary!
About four days later Color Me Mine called and said the ceramics were ready for pickup. I dashed back to Geneva while my daughter was at school mostly because I was so excited to see how they turned out. I think they are beautiful. When she got home from school that day, I had both pieces sitting out on the table and she shrieked when she saw them! "They are done? Daddy look, this is what we made on our special day!" Awww, my heart! Now, I can't wait to see what is to come when I take my son on our date. To be continued...
As parents, do you too find you need to shift tactics every few years?
What do you do to make sure you are getting quality time in with your kids?
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